You heard it here first folks, how many of you are stressing out? Uh-huh, we were afraid of that. But, that's OK, just take it easy, as there is a simple cure now. The only thing you need to do, is go out and buy a new standalone DVD recorder. That's it! Do it quickly, don't dilly dally, show you give a damn about yourself or especially your loved ones, just this once. You can even tell your significant other, (if you have one or more) that you are draining the bank account merely to insure that you can spend more time with them, as small amounts of stress are healthful now and will increase your longevity!
This is great for women, but of course the technique described below is, shall we say, unintuitive for the male gender, as real men...don't read the instructions.
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By putting his patients in stressful situations, Dr Kyriazis believes their bodies produce more of the proteins that are used to repair cells. The process, known as hormesis, means cells are left stronger than they were before being repaired and harmful chemicals, which can lead to disease are removed. Mildly stressful situations that Dr Kyriazis prescribed for his patients included packing bags at the last minute for a flight abroad and trying to programme a new DVD recorder by following the instruction manual. |
OK, that ain't Dr. Marios Kyriazis, of the British Longevity Society pictured above, it's Dr. Sigmund Freud, but surely he would concur, if he were only alive today! Especially if we could find a device of the right shape and proportion for the undertaking. The good Dr. Kyriazis did admit unfortunately, that pesky clinical trials would have to be undertaken before the radical therapy could be widely used. But, why should we wait, what possible harm can it do? The results so far have been presented over at the Anti-Ageing Conference in London, that's good enough for us!
We have to wonder if Pioneer, Matsushita (Panasonic) and LiteOn won't use Dr. Kyriazis theories in their next ad campaign. Let's hope so, even if it only succeeds in extending male lives a few years. Men will need this extra time of course...since real men don't ask for directions!
Source: The Scotsman News
